psst – I’m Not Doing It All
People often say to me, “I don’t know how you do it all.” I don’t tell you this to brag or sound prideful. I tell you this because I want you to know that, just like every other wife and mom, I am not doing it all. I am drowning . . . just like you.
Most nights my family eats grilled cheese sandwiches or corn dogs because I don’t even think about dinner until about 4:00 p.m. We eat green beans out of a can and sometimes I give my kids apples without washing them (I know, we’re rebels).
As much as I love organization and order, my house looks like a professional organizer’s before picture. Shoes in the bathroom and towels in the bedroom, remote control in the Ziploc bag drawer (WTH?), and Beanie Boos in the freezer (don’t ask). My carefully thought-out fixer-upper looks like a frat house on a Sunday morning.
Our diet is abysmal and my house is a wreck. Can you relate? I am limping along in this journey called life and most days I am just praying I make it to the finish line. How many more years until my youngest graduates??? I am tired, overwhelmed, and most days I feel like a failure because I set the bar so high that I will never be able to pole vault over it.
But two things I know—two things I cling to—are that God is full of grace, and so is my family. God has given me more than I can handle, and for that I am grateful. God knows I need to be in burdened if I am to rely on Him. I am independent, strong, and determined; therefore, God knew that if He gave me a predictable, manageable life, then I would have no need for Him. So He gave me A LOT: a lot of responsibility, a lot of people, a lot of chaos to love, teach, manage, protect, and nurture.
And my family. They give me so much more grace than I give to myself or to others. They are beautiful teachers. My husband doesn’t complain when I disappear for the evening to write or “forget” to do the laundry (again).
My kids don’t complain when I forget about crazy sock day or don’t have homemade brownies waiting for them after school. They won’t think back on these years with memories of delicious meals or creative crafts. But they will remember sitting around the dinner table together (even if we ate Hot Pockets), family dance parties, nightly prayers, and conversations about our Savior.
Friends, no one is doing it all. Not me. Not you. Not even Jesus did it all. Scripture tells us he left the crowd to pray, which means he called a time out on productivity to connect with his Father. He also moved from town to town, which means he said “No” to some people so he could say, “Yes” to others. He disappointed people, but he never disappointed his Father. How? Because he kept his eye on the end goal.
What is your end goal?
Mine is to love God and love others. To help others know that hope and healing from their past is possible, and that God offers redemption and restoration to everyone. So if the laundry doesn’t get done or we eat another grilled cheese sandwich so I can pour into one more person, so be it. I don’t think my family will mind. They don’t expect me to do it all.
Let yourself off the hook, friend.
No one is doing it all.
Not me. Not you. No one.
And that’s the way it’s supposed to be.